Kitten, you were very good today. Your willingness to submit to my authority and your eagerness to please me are deeply satisfying–and exciting–to me. I understand that you feel calmed and made safe by my dominance of you. Your submission makes me feel, perhaps ironically, proud and protective and tender toward you. When you submit to me, I want to rest my hand on your cheek and look into your eyes and smile at you, and reassure you, and tell you how much you please me, and what a good girl you are.
The harder the things I do to you, the more valuable your submission. I think we both understand how that works, how it’s your yielding to difficult and uncomfortable things that most strongly communicates your willingness to surrender to me. For your part, I assume that, by submitting to my more extreme demands, you know you’re being especially good, especially obedient–and that that will mean even more to me. It does, Kitten.
Today, when I walked in and found you kneeling just as I’d told you to, I was pleased to see that your eyes were downcast–I hadn’t told you to wait for me that way, but it was exactly what I wanted.
We started, as we always do, with you kneeling for me and feeling my cock grow big and hard in your mouth, until you can’t take it all in anymore. Each time you do this excites me more, Kitten. Your small moans, the attention you give with your lips and your tongue, the way you press your hands against my thighs and I watch my hard shaft sliding slowly between your lips–Kitten, I always want it, and I always want more.
When I tied your hands behind you and rolled you on to your back, I know that was uncomfortable for you. I watched you arch your back, trying to find a way to relieve the pressure on your wrists. I knew it was uncomfortable, but I left you that way anyway, because I wanted to touch your breasts, put my hand on your throat, look at your face as I thrust my fingers into your pussy. You didn’t fuss or complain–of course you wouldn’t, because you’re a good girl and fussing would get you in trouble, but I was still pleased that you didn’t.
When I choked you with my cock, when I knelt behind you and fucked you too hard, hard enough that it hurt, and when I pushed my big cock so deep into your ass despite the pain you obviously felt–when I did all these things, you could have stopped me with a word, but you didn’t. And I was very proud of you, Kitten, and very pleased.
You didn’t want to come a particular way, and you told me so. That was okay; don’t worry about that. I never told you how to communicate to me something you don’t want to do, how you should ask to let you not do it–perhaps by offering, begging, to take my cock deep into your throat instead. I’ll think about that and tell you how to ask in the future.
But there are two things different about that situation than a normal one, Kitten. Your orgasms are special things, and I’ll be sensitive to you about them in a way I won’t be about causing you pain or discomfort. That’s one thing. The other thing is that your concern wasn’t about pain, or having to do a hard thing. It was about being self-conscious and uncomfortable. I want you to feel secure in your submission, never embarrassed by it. Exhausted, challenged, pained, yes. But not embarrassed.
(cont’d)