Kitten,

Yes, you’re right, I don’t mind choking you with my cock, making you gag and cough. I know it was a challenge for you, particularly when I held your neck so tightly and drove my cock so deep into you. I know you like it, I know it’s a little frightening and intense as well, and I know you’re sore afterwards from my hard cock thrusting into your throat.

And, yes, you’re right: I do like it when it’s difficult for you. I like taking that liberty with you, demanding a hard and uncomfortable thing from you. I like–no, I love–that you submit to my demands, that you give me what you know I want, and that you feel proud when you do it, no matter how difficult it is.

There will be days, Kitten, when it’s much harder than that. There will be days when I really do thrust until you almost beg me to pause, and you pull your head back and gasp and cough and swallow and try to catch your breath. And I’ll wait a moment, long enough for you to safely breathe, and then I won’t be gentle with you. I’ll say “again, Kitten,” and tighten my grip on your neck, and push you down on my big, hard, wet cock. And it will go on and on, until you hardly know where you are or what you’re doing, just that, when I say “again, Kitten,” you know you have to breathe in and open your mouth and relax your throat and close your eyes tightly and just endure my cock thrusting into your throat. You’ll stop caring about anything except waiting for me to let you up again, and breathing before it starts again.

And when it’s all over, Kitten, you’ll press your face against my chest and cling to me, thankful that I’ve stopped, and I’ll hold you close and tell you how proud of you I am that you worked so hard and took so much for me. I won’t be sorry for the discomfort, I’ll just be pleased with you for having endured it.

You’ll come to think of those days, Kitten, as especially difficult, as days when your Querido is at his most demanding, when he forces himself on you–knowing, always, that you can stop it, stop it instantly, with a word or a gesture. (And you should know, Kitten, that I’ll never punish you or be disappointed in you if it’s too much for you, or if you’re too afraid. I need you to know that, because I have to trust you to stop me if it really is too much. My belief that you will do that is my license to demand so much of you. So stop me if you feel a need or strong desire, and I’ll hold you close and comfort you.)

There will be other days, Kitten, when I’m excessive in other ways. I know that I sometimes go too deep, fill you too much, when I’m making love to you. There will be days when I seem not to care, when I seem even to enjoy causing you the pain of my cock so deep inside you. On those days, I’ll watch you gasp and grimace and hold the sheets tightly in your hands, just waiting for it to end. There will be days when I spank you so hard it brings tears to your eyes, and you want me to stop but aren’t quite willing to admit defeat and ask me to.

There will be days that are simply too much. On those days, always, I’ll comfort you afterwards. I’ll let you curl up in my arms, curl up on my lap, and rock you slowly, stroke your hair, kiss you gently.

Most days, Kitten, it won’t be too much. It will be a lot; you’ll ache, your lips will be swollen, your throat sore. You’ll be red, and have marks where the bindings were tight on you, and small bruises. But it won’t be too much.

Oh, and yes, you’re right, of course: it really is for both of us. You know I enjoy dominating you, and I know you enjoy submitting, enjoy the feeling of control being taken from you, of surrendering your authority and being commanded. And we both enjoy the sex, the physical sensations and the feeling of being desired and of pleasing the other. Yes, it’s mutual–it’s all mutual. And that, my beloved Kitten, is what makes it all so wonderful.

Love,
YOUR Querido